A Step to Self
It is not easy to know yourself in this society. Especially in the twenty first century — the century of socialization. In the medical university we are leaning rules of conduct with patients, how doctor should look in order for a patient to trust him. Then the students might forget and get a tattoo or a piercing. Later patients start to criticize a doctor, to find carelessness in his behavior, to attribute levity to treatment. Because of this we can lose paths to self-realization trying to suit to the ‘norms’. So, how can we not lose our “Self”?
In sixteen century French writer Michel de Montaigne thought about the nature of human spirit. He said, the most important thing in the world is to be able to belong to self. Think about it, centuries have passed but the problem of accepting self hasn’t been solved. Let’s try to figure it out.
People are unique with their social nature. How can we understand human? Only one description of social behavior includes a massive amount of knowledge about brain chemistry and hormones, early child development, genes, culture evolution, ecology etc. We observe the world differently: some see the beauty in a gloomy autumn weather and some, in the most beautiful day can’t smile. Everyone has their own path; his characteristics and values that matters to him. However, while person grows up, he gets afraid their own wishes and hide behind his mask. They are afraid of judgment, they sacrifice their own opinions and they do what their parents and friends want.
Why do some teenagers at the age of sixteen understand their abilities so well and they know who they will be, tying their path with a profession, and others aren’t even sure in the correct way? When I studied in 9th grade, I understood well where is my place, what is my life. I finished the first course of the physician department because I had motivation and ambitions. While my classmates study in the university because their parents ‘advised’ them to. They are disappointed in life and they are afraid to change it. Why, when you need to choose a direction, why do some people go straight with bravery and others stands at the same place being afraid? I think the reason is in the presence or lack of inner harmony in the person.
Michel de Montagne thought that the true happiness person can reach when he gets a ‘Personality’. It expresses through active life position and character that help to look at your own strength and abilities objectively.
The understanding of self is the important side of a successful person. Brendon Burchard in his book “High Performance Habits: How Extraordinary People Become That Way” writes that if we often resist fear, we then feel stress less. If we get experience in a talk with self, then it will be easier to accept self. The next questions help to understand myself; maybe they will help you, too.
Do you believe in your strength? A confidence of self — is the most important step to get a balance between ‘want’ and ‘can’.
What should people appreciate you for? You can come to this question with different ways: I am precious because someone needs me or I am precious because I am full of ambitions and I am able to give benefits to the society etc. But what is really important? Your actions. Things that you do are creating your ‘Self’. The true value includes in your actions.
What makes you happy? Learn to analyze your mood and reasons of it. So you can start to do something that fills your energy.
Do you feel uncomfortable talking with people? It’s an important question because when you answer it, you will understand that you are a “lone wolf” or a “team player”.
How often do you remember your unlucky cases? Since childhood they tell you to learn based on our mistakes, but don’t you think we should learn based on your success? You should aim to make big things, make plans for the next five years. Don’t be afraid of your goals.
Do you want to reach any goal? The rules are simple: love yourself, dream and enjoy your life and it’ll show you the bright sides.
text Tatyana Fedyaeva
edited by Reshma Durai
